Sorry, it was only a rather competitive joke...
But on the other side I would like to get one original parallel cable if this is really one of them. And also an original RGB cable if you have a spare one(you showed one of them on the pictures you sent me). I think that these connectors complement a lot with the overall design of the computer. My hand made ones adapt very good to the holes and edge, but aren't so stylish.
About the other connectors... EnterMice covers the rest of the holes much better....
No, I'm not interested on the tapes, thanks, I don't want to return to that era.... But may be my friend Sinclair200 can buy you some. He is a collector of all type of things. I can ask him. Put a price.